Sanctuary Or Cage

Locked away in this chosen room
I find peace and sanctuary

Outside I hear the roar
of motorcycles and sirens
some children playing too

But here inside I embrace
my solitude unless I decide
to venture out and change it

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A New Tomorrow 

You climbed into your car
and drove away
looking for a new tomorrow

Yes you were afraid but
you drove off anyway

Leaving behind the life
you knew and friends too

For the yearning was more
than you could bear

Even greater than the fear

Now in the dark of night
alone in your car

You focus on tomorrow

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My Slice Of Heaven

 (Photoes courtesy of Alexa Branum)

Seagulls swooping overhead
and wet sand between my toes
reminds me why I love this place.

Walking in quiet solitude, remembering happy times
brings me such peace and joy.

I would return more often
if my eyes allowed it
because there’s no where else
I’d rather be.

This is my slice of Heaven
until The Real Thing comes for me.

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I decided to start with this Chex Mix photo because it sums up so well how Life and its twists and turns can make your existence so interesting If you remember to relax and enjoy the ride.

Sunday (Aug 23) The Kids (my son and daughter-in-law) returned to Ozark for the first time since moving to Dothan. For some strange reason I thought they were never coming back to visit again, which was pretty silly, unless you consider the story I’m sharing with you now…

The Kids returned to help me set up my WiFi printer and helped me change their vacated bedroom into an office. They were here about 5 hours (at least half of that time was spent fighting with the printer installation). They called me on their way home to tell me the car was over heating. (Now I begin to realize why they’re so hesitant about returning to Ozark because it seems like something always happens!)

I drove to Dothan Monday in case their car had to go in for repairs, but it only needed antifreeze/coolant. My oil cap got lost in Dothan, but it wasn’t until Tuesday (Aug 25) that I realized this. We checked my oil when we added the coolant to The Kids’ car and then we drove around to check both cars. My car was smoking, but I’ve had a leaky valve cover for years; so I really wasn’t too concerned.

By the time I got home Monday night, the smoke was so thick I was gagging, but I decided to wait until Tuesday to lift the hood which was a blessing because oil was everywhere! If I had checked it Monday night I probably would have gotten burned because it had spewed up to the hood latch.

I drove to the closest auto parts place and bought an oil cap, a wiper blade for my back window and more coolant (since I’d given mine to The Kids). I had to return at 3pm yesterday because that was when my new oil cap would be delivered. Unfortunately it was the wrong size; so that meant another return trip today.

It took a long time for me to make that trip today. I was worried I was going to blow the car’s engine. I had already driven back from Dothan, and driven around Ozark with oil spewing all over my engine. The parts store opened at 7am and I finally got there at noon… after loading 2 qts of oil in the car, and saying my prayers about 20 times.

This cap was the right size. The nice man at O’Reily’s even checked my oil and said my “little tank” (an accurate name) was only 1 qt low! Now I’m “vegetating” on the couch; so gratefully acknowledging The Universe and Life. L’Chaim and onward…

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Reality Check Please!

Reality Check Please! How often have we wished thinking or muttering those words would make everything better (or at least make us believe it was possible). I’ve been lethargic since my ex-husband died July 22 (9 days before my birthday). I wasn’t planning anything fancy, but never expected for his death to affect me so much.

Even this morning I again cried enough to cause my head to get congested which is surprising because after all these years I should have these feelings buried deep enough to keep them from sneaking up on me. Now I find myself wondering if I’ll spend the rest of my days thinking about him instead of celebrating mine and Mom’s birthdays (July 31 and Aug 2) when they recur.

Got into my trusty car at dawn this morning to go to Hardee’s for breakfast and the emergency brake wouldn’t release! Kept pulling the brake up and releasing it, but the back wheel was locked. Finally put the shifter in D1 and then Reverse and got the car to buck backwards like it was bouncing over something which tells me to stop setting the emergency brake and drive the car more often even if it’s just to the gas station.

My reasons for blogging about this is because I don’t want you to make my mistakes. Yes it’s true, some days it is difficult to get moving, but when you really think about it it’s better than doing nothing. Onward my friends! Onward.

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Such Is Life

I am taken aback by these jumbled feelings upon the news of Bernard Sr’s death.

Where once I felt numb (or so I thought) tears and sobs prove otherwise.

Happy and sad memories swirl around together creating more curious emotions, and perhaps regret.

How can this be for a man I have not seen since 1989?

I sit and reminisce for a moment thinking of what could have been … and was.

RIP and thank you for Bernard Jr, our wonderful son.

I am sorry you never got the chance to know him, but such is life.

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Tick Tick Tick

I hear the clock’s heart beat
That rhythmic ticking sound
Conveys to me
That I am not alone

Once there was a time
Not so long ago
When the sound annoyed me
But those days are gone
For now I am alone
And the ticking comforts me

So raise your glasses high
And be grateful
For aggravating moments
Soon will be gone
And just you
And the ticking clock will remain

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