Ha Ha I Won!

I bought a new “made in China” toilet seat over the weekend that was supposed to be a standard fit size.  I was so excited when I got home because I really needed a new seat, but the screws were square and were supposed to fit inside the grooves shown in this photo.  The screws were supposed to tighten until they snuggly fit in the grooves, but the nuts would not tighten because of the commode’s shape.  I tried and tried until my fingers hurt to tighten those stupid squares, and finally quit.

Lucky for me (sometimes it pays to be what’s called a “pack rat”) I had screws left from other toilet seat replacements; so I scrounged around and found the round screw(s) displayed in the photo.  Once I had them in place I discovered the little plastic tops would not close; so I thought I’d replace all the plastic pieces from the old toilet seat to the new one.

I am not mechanically inclined so you can imagine how much fun I had trying to figure out how to put the lid and seat together with those damn plastic pieces!  I was so proud … until I put the new and improved seat on the commode and discovered it wouldn’t fit.  So once again I had to reimagine how the pieces fit together (which I got backwards) and replace all the plastic.  By then I was dancing around and thought I’d have to pretend my yard was the woods.

Finally I was ready to put the round screws into the holes of the newly reworked replacement toilet seat and screwed one in crooked!  But … I won because I finally had the seat on the commode, and carefully used it for 2 whole days until I got some “muscles” here to unscrew the crooked one and re-re-rescrew it!

What did I learn from this caper, you ask?  Well:  (1) I learned to allow extra time for problems or have a backup plan for when Nature calls. (2) Have somebody with muscles handy in case you can’t screw screws in straight. (3) Always keep the old pieces when you replace the toilet seat because you may need then.  (4) Be prepared for standard fit to not always be standard, especially when it’s “Made In China.”  And lastly: Keep Smiling!


About sandrabranum

I'm a philosopher, dreamer, poet, writer -- not necessarily in that order -- and I get to write it all down and share it with the world thanks to the Wonderful World Wide Web!
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